Why Getting Sober Is So Hard
Some things you maybe haven't considered
Getting sober is one of the hardest things you’ll ever do. You are walking away from so many things: People, Coping Skills, Rituals, Memorized Behaviors, Community, Connection, and A Well-Worn Version of YOU.
It takes great courage to bring the boxcars of your life to a screeching halt over what looks like a definitively fatal and infinite abyss. Refuse to keep trucking in the obligatory direction; not only reverse but reimagine the entire steam engine of your life. I say this not to deter you from the best decision you’ll ever make but to validate your hesitancy, fear, and apprehension. Rest assured that every person who has ever gotten sober has had the same thoughts trolling through their brain boxes:
“But what will they think?”
“But will he still love me if I quit?”
“But will I still belong?”
“But who am I if I’m no longer a drinker?”
I do not practice A.A., but it works for a lot of people, and here are the things I think it does well:
Offers an immediate sense of community and belonging
Utilizes storytelling as a connection point
Gives actionable items for achieving sobriety (steps 1-12), which fill the gap where drinking used to be
As moms, we are terrified to quit drinking. Every play date, get-together, celebration, commiseration, hatch, match, and dispatch has alcohol as its nucleus. Drinking is such a normalized behavior that we ostracize our peers for NOT doing it. (I know because I used to be one of those moms: “Don’t invite Julie! She doesn’t drink [enough]!”) It has become an act of treason to stop drinking in a circle of moms who do. The thought of being judged mercilessly or deemed “an alcoholic” for choosing to better our lives will keep most of us trapped in a cycle of pain and torment for far longer than is reasonable. This fact snags the wool of my heart every time I think about it. And I reckon it’s time we change the narrative.
What I propose is a SoberCreative Workshop + Community. A place you can go where everybody knows your name, supports and validates your evolution, and instills healthy, creative coping strategies and rituals to replace what you just walked away from (*see above).
The community is for women only, and will meet once a week on Wednesdays at 12pm CST. I want to keep it small so there’s only a limited number of spots. Send an email to rosie@yourwildsobriety if you want me to hold a space for you:) I’m so excited to see where this goes!!!
